Earth – Cairn by Cairn

Ten of Earth

Ten of Earth
Dark Goddess Tarot

First Impressions: My first impressions of Ala are that she is stiff and statue like and is not interacting with her people. She also is very much a goddess of fertility with the prominent breasts and the design painted on her stomach.

Book: Kin and Kind, living and dead are all part of one another, totality of the earth in all its variety and appearances, Goddess of morality and judgement, keeper of customs and laws.

Guidance: Let relationships go as needed, do not seek vengeance, celebrate good fortune, celebrate those whose work you admire, keep and renew your relationship with the earth

Journaling:

This reading hits where I’m at today about the need to let go of people without vengeance. It is about shedding the ties that no longer should be binding us. My tie to John is a big one as he hurt me badly. I had an interesting dream last night. I dreamed we were sleeping together and he made an amorous advance. Initially, I responded to him, but then my dream rewound and I asked him if he loved me or if I was just convenient. When he didn’t respond, I knew everything I needed to know. This helped me to realize that our issues were not all about me and that he really does see women as objects.

January 20, 2018

As I read this, I’m realizing that my relationship with the earth also needs to include my relationship with my body. This was an incredibly hard week and I lost my connection to both the earth and myself. I spent most of my week in my head dealing with issues and lost track of the world around me. I didn’t make time to go to the ocean or to ground myself and I’m paying the price. This week may be just as insane, but I need to make time to ground and take care of myself.

Siren of Earth

Siren of Earth
Dark Goddess Tarot

First Impressions: I don’t like this card at first glance because it looks as if her face is on her ass. However, when I look more closely, I realize her face is on her stomach as it is about the bawdy and wonderful things that Baubo does. My initial thoughts on this were thinking with other parts of our body than our heads.

Book: This is the life in the belly: raw, ridiculous, sublime; Goddess of the belly laugh, power of laughter to activate the power of creativity. This is the time for feminine renewal and sexuality

Guidance: Laugh and smile deliberately, explore your body, explore physicality, be outlandish

Journaling:

I love the reminder to be bawdy and explore my uncivilized self. I’m not sure how I feel about being in the company of women as that’s always been disappointing for me. I’ve never been comfortable with women. I feel relations with women are stilted and as if they don’t get me. I’ve always been much more comfortable with men. Of course, today it is much too cold to be bawdy about anything! The wood room is freezing and I don’t know if I’ll ever be warm!

January 2, 2018

It’s interesting as I reflect on this as to why this card makes me really uncomfortable and it goes back to a lot of interactions with other women. Oddly, in these interactions I was the prude:

When I was a preteen or a young teenager we were at my Grandmother Babcock’s house making butter and she said something about not getting pregnant by holding a pill between my legs. At the time, I had no clue what she was talking about, but it made me uncomfortable.
My mother was talking to a friend while I was in the backseat of the car when I was 10 or so and she said something about my dad reaching for her breast and grabbing a roll of fat instead. That made me incredibly uncomfortable.
When John and I were first dating, we went to Joan and George’s and Vicky and Joyce were talking about my breasts and how they had kept growing. That was so awkward and made me uncomfortable, but when I protested I was told I was too sensitive.

In my mind all three of these interactions were really inappropriate and made me feel uncomfortable. I have no problem making impersonal bawdy comments, but two of these were directed at me and the third was by my mother…ick. John also made me uncomfortable because he’d have really inappropriate conversations with the kids and when I asked him to stop, he refused and told me I was too sensitive.

What I’m realizing this as I read this is that I’m not really a prude and I don’t necessarily think other women are prudes, but I want agency over bawdy conversations and I want my feelings to be listened to and to not be told I’m too sensitive or that I need to lighten up.

Wow! Pretty incredible what the cards tell us when we pay attention and listen.

Witch of Earth

Witch of Earth
Dark Goddess Tarot

First Impressions: I initially thought this card was showing Inanna welcoming a lover in a cave, which would be Ereshkigal’s domain. However, she is welcoming a lover in a bower, drawing him with her loveliness. Inanna always speaks to me of death and rebirth.

Book: Make magic in your partnership with natural forces, storehouse where grain was stored awaiting transformation into grain, Inanna’s body was one with the earth.

Guidance: Learn your plant allies, express your creativity through baking, or other trans-formative actions, approach everyday tasks with a sense of service.

Journaling:

One of the things I have been working on is to approach life with a sense that we are all in this together. I’ve also been working hard to foster kindness, especially with people in service positions. I know people often look down on service workers and/or are nasty to them, but anyone doing an honest and hard job deserves to be appreciated. It doesn’t take any more effort to be kind to people than to be nasty and I feel so much better about myself when I am kind.

December 27, 2018

In some ways it feels weird to equate kindness with Inanna, because I always think of her and her sister together and she definitely was not kind to Ereshkigal. She went down and invaded her home with her uppity attitude as if she was the queen of the underworld and had the right to treat people like crap. In my mind she deserved to get her comeuppance as she was a bitch.

However, my personal feelings about the myths aside, when I think about the sign at the Ritz-Carlton, “Ladies and Gentleman taking care of Ladies and Gentleman.” That slogan put people on an equal footing and conveyed the message that everyone was worth of respect. I try to approach life like that because I am no better or worse than anyone else, I’m just a person trying to get by.

I have to be honest and say that if anything, it took me a long time to get over the thought that I was worse than or less than other people. I always thought that I deserved the scraps and that it was okay if people disrespected me. I’ve put a lot of hard work into changing that impression of myself and most days, I feel good about myself.

Five of Earth

Five of Earth
Dark Goddess Tarot

First Impressions: Demeter is so sad and desolate on this card. I feel the barrenness of the earth as if all of the life has been taken away. This is definitely a card of loss and the need to come in from the cold. There is a different kind of barrenness outside my window today as it is cold and snowy and the darkness is creeping over the world even though it is just 4 pm.

Book: Give no part of yourself to that which does not sustain you.

Guidance: Accept the fallow times as part of the cycle, release expectation

Journaling:

I love and needed to hear the messages of this card today. I am so impatient that I fail to see all the wonders around me. I get so caught up in the hustle and bustle of every day that I often forget that the best things in life take time. Demeter also reminds me of the importance of taking time to mourn and be still within myself.

December 13, 2017

Although it wasn’t the main plot line on NCIS NOLA last night, the interplay between Dwayne and his dad was meaningful to me. The idea of being free of a parent is so liberating. I think I have been trying so hard to be the “modern woman” that I’ve forgotten you can have love and a career. Interesting that this is all coming up around Demeter, who lost herself in grief for her daughter.

December 18, 2017

All I need to do is to be myself. I don’t need to make up for anything or to prove anything to anyone. I just need to be me.

December 27, 2017

The message that all I need to do is be myself is so powerful and it is a lesson that I desperately needed to hear. I get so caught up in trying to live up to other people’s expectations that I forget that I just need to live life for me. I think that is why I am so adamant that my blog is mine and mine alone. It is not meant to be a place of wisdom for other people, although I am always willing to freely share what I have learned.

Child of Earth

Child of Earth
Gaian Tarot

First Impressions: This card is a card of innocence. I love how big the apple is compared to the child’s hands and how he looks so studious. This card makes me think of intensity, protection, a child’s heart, contemplation, innocence, and being aware

Journaling:

Exploring the earth, happiness, being attuned to my intuition and divine wisdom and knowing in my soul what makes me happy. Letting go of pretenses. I know what would make me happy: coming home every night.

May 8, 2016

This card is about exploring, but it is also about innocence and trusting the universe to provide. Maybe I need to trust the universe to provide what I need and to quit trying to control everything.

January 2, 2018

As I reflect on the almost two years since I pulled this card, I’m realizing that the message was to get tuned into earth and to let go of all the crap that has built up in my soul and is keeping me separated from my intuition and from my innocence. It is innocence that helps us reclaim our connection to the divine by eliminating all the doubts and fears that keep us from believing that there is something bigger than ourselves out there. When we are able to let go of that fear and find the happiness within our soul, we can find that divine spark within ourselves and within others.